Why I like monkeys

If you, like I, get your new headlines ripped straight from Kevin and Bean, this is probably old news to you. The subway system in New Delhi India is being overrun by monkeys. They ride the trains like you and I might. If you offer them food, everything is cool. If not, they take it by force. Metro authorities have employed Langur monkeys, a larger and more aggressive species, to scare off the mischievous monkey hordes.
This is not the first time India has had a problem with marauding monkeys. Whole towns have been taken over by the pernicious primates. It's gonna be just like Planet of the Apes.
So, you see, this is why I like monkeys. Because, when they fulfill their manifest destiny of world domination, you better be on their side... or else!